Letting go isn’t about cutting ties; it’s about trusting your client’s ability to move forward, trusting they have the resources they need, and trusting yourself as a professional.
When we start working with a new client, our instinct is to build rapport and create the conditions to provide a safe space to reflect, raise awareness and move towards defined objectives. We invest time, energy, and empathy into their growth, so when a coaching programme ends, it can feel like saying goodbye to a friend.
Over the years, I’ve had conversations with many coaches – especially those new to the profession – who struggle with this transition. It’s natural to feel attached, with a reluctance to fully ‘let go’.
Setting boundaries is essential for both the client’s independence and our own wellbeing.
Coaching is about empowering clients to become self-sufficient, not dependent. From the very first session, we’re helping them build confidence and clarity so that they can thrive without us. When we keep this in mind, while acknowledging that coaching is a time-bound activity, it can make the ending feel more like a natural progression rather than a loss.
Set out your boundaries from the beginning, as part of the contracting. Consider what boundaries are important to you about ‘endings’, defining each person’s roles and responsibilities. Share what will happen at the end of the programme. When clients know what to expect, the transition feels smoother for both sides. It’s not unusual to re-contract and re-define boundaries at different times throughout the programme, stuff comes up!
It’s okay to feel attached – it means you care. But notice if you’re holding on because you feel responsible for their future success. Trust the process. You’ve equipped them with tools and insights; now it’s their turn to use them. If appropriate, let clients know they can reach out for future support, but avoid leaving the door wide open for ongoing informal coaching. A clear boundary might sound like: “I’d love to hear how things go, and if you’d like more coaching down the line, we can arrange a new programme.”
The final session is a wonderful opportunity to reflect on progress and achievements. If you recall in a previous newsletter, I talked about the pressure we put on ourselves to ‘wrap things up neatly’ by the end of the session/programme. “Coaching isn’t about tidy conclusions – it’s about movement, awareness, and growth.”
Invite your client to share what they’ve learned and how they’ll sustain their growth. This creates a sense of closure and reinforces their independence.
Letting go isn’t about cutting ties; it’s about trusting your client’s ability to move forward, trusting they have the resources they need, and trusting yourself as a professional.
How do you manage endings in your coaching practice? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Helen Isacke, founder of Trusted Coach Directory is also an EMCC Accredited Coach Supervisor. As a reflective partner, Helen works with coaches who are keen to learn and grow on a professional and personal level through exploring their client work and coaching practice. With 20+ years’ experience of professional coaching, Helen brings a wealth of experience having trained in various coaching models including NLP, Clean Language, FIRO Theory, TA101 and a range of profiling tools.
If you would like to find out more about how Helen, her rates and how she works as a Coach Supervisor, please get in touch to arrange a call [email protected]